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[386-1]business emails
Akiko
[ 2009/11/24(火)10:43
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Hi Seth,
I am currently involved in wholesale telecommunications business and would like to ask you about business emails. My Japanese boss told me to write emails without using subjects- instead of writing "I am (or We are) inquiring regarding...", he insists me writing "Am (or Are) inquiring regarding...". But I have never heard of English sentences not beginning with a subject. Even when I was working at an American firm, I'd never received English emails that begin with a "am" or "are". Is it just that I am not familiar enough with wholesale business emails, or is my boss trying to push his own way of English writing? I'd appreciate your advice. |
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[386-2]
セス
[ 2009/11/24(火)11:29
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Hi Akiko,
Thanks for your question.
To be honest, the way your boss is asking you to write is a method that is not easily done. It is writing without using pronouns. Did you ask why your boss wants the email written this way? It is most often seen in resume writing where the pronoun is defined by whose resume it is, therefore not needing to write the pronoun.
Email English is almost ALWAYS written in first person and is a spoken (not written) voice. This means that you would use the words 'I' and 'We' and write contractions and abbreviations and such. This BBS is also an acceptable place to write in such a way.
From your brief explanation, it sounds like you boss is trying to sound like a legal document. This way of writing is fine for contracts, affidavits, court motions and other legal documents. I will also say that these documents are always more difficult for someone to understand and can become very confusing. I would personally never write an email in such a way (business or not). There may be a case that I would write a ‘letter’ in this way, but the situation is rare.
Most, if not all, business emails should be written in first person and be simple, clear and direct. This is especially true in the international English business world. You never know if the receiving person has any ability in English and it is better to write so that anyone (beginner or advanced) can understand it.
I am not going to say that your boss is wrong (because that way of writing is a correct way of writing), but I wouldn't recommend that type of writing for any email. It has a very detached feel to it and cannot contain any real feeling (i.e. politeness).
I hope you can sort things out and if you have any other comments, questions or concerns feel free to ask.
Seth |
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[386-4]
Akiko
[ 2009/11/25(水)14:00
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Hi Seth,
Thank you for taking your time answering my question.
To answer your quesetion- why my boss wants the emails to be written that way- is because 1) he is the only person in charge of the matters written in the email, and 2) he is the only person in charge of writing English emails from our office in Tokyo. Thus, he insists on not writing first-person 'I' because it is obvious.
I understand how legal documents can be difficult and confusing, especially when they are written in the way my boss is writing his emails. But none of my boss's emails includes legal contents. In addition, he LOVES using abbreviations, such as '39' for 'thank you', 'B. RGDS' for 'Bests Regards', etc. Maybe it is okay to write so to one's subordinates, but using abbreviations like that in external emails, to me, doesn't seem very appropriate. And I agree with what you mean about the emails having a detached feel. I prefer to write emails using 'I' and 'We', but it seems very difficult to persuade my boss- he has been exchanging emails in his way for more than ten years, and I am spotting quite a few grammatical errorrs in his emails. Maybe, I have to accept and follow his style of emails.
Aside from the above topic, I have another question I would like to ask. We are getting ready to send Christmas cards at our firm, and I am typing in international addresses. There are couple of addresses where we want to use "ご一同様" like "Mr. Brown and ご一同様". What is the best way to phrase this in English? I have come up with a few ideas- "Mr Brown and the team", "Mr. Brown and his team", "Mr. Brown and his friends". Would any of the listed above work? Please advice. I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you. |
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[386-5]
セス
[ 2009/11/25(水)14:58
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You're welcome for the answers, Akiko.
If your boss has been writing that way for years, there is very little you can do other than correct the gramatical errors that you spot. I would still recommend that you personally use pronouns as it is a more accepted way of writing.
To answer your other question, the correct and natural way of writing "Mr. Brown and ご一同様" would be "Mr. Brown and company". This 'company' doesn't mean company as in a business, but 'company' as in those people that associate with Mr. Brown (i.e. his coworkers and/or staff).
I hope this helps. |
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